The Good Intentions Podcast
Good Intentions connects with experts and storytellers around social impact, psychology, mindfulness, personal growth, and health.
Each conversation unpacks the beliefs and rituals that drive and ground each guest. You will hear about achievements that go beyond the conventional and tangible to a deeper level, finding the meaning and intention behind what we do.
I believe that there is a deep longing in our culture and society for something more: something higher, something deeper. Material possessions and technology do not satisfy our souls. As human beings we long for connection.
I'm on a mission to spread positivity, drive connectivity and to inspire others to live a more meaningful life.
The Good Intentions Podcast
Ep 46 - The Menopause Revolution: How to Embrace Change and Thrive - Fiona Day
Fiona Day is an incredible woman - she's an intuitive consultant and an energy healer - and she's also the only guest I've ever had on the show twice!
The last time I spoke to her was January 2020 - just before the world got turned on it's head - back then we talked a lot about energy and how we can tune into our own intuition and feelings.
This time we got together to talk about the menopause - a life change that Fiona has been recently navigating. She talked to me with such honesty and positivity about her journey and it was such a welcome, refreshing conversation. Fiona has a very open personality and when you throw in the fact that she's also an intuitive consultant and an energy healer, and you really get a completely different dimension to a conversation.
We talked about how culture and society affects the way we talk about the menopause, the loss of self that many women feel and how we can navigate it and find ourselves.
Fiona is so passionate about helping other women live their best lives and this shines through in this epsiode.
I hope you enjoy our conversation as much as I did.
Follow me, and the Good Intentions podcast:
https://www.instagram.com/kellyharvarde/
Find the wonderful Fiona here:
https://www.fionaday.com
Immerse yourself in some of the books we discussed:
Many Lives, Many Masters - Brian Weiss
https://www.amazon.com/Many-Lives-Masters-Prominent-Psychiatrist/dp/0671657860
Only Love is Real - Brian Weiss
https://www.amazon.com/Only-Love-Real-Soulmates-Reunited/dp/0446672653
The Celestine Prophecy - James Redfield
https://www.amazon.com/Celestine-Prophecy-James-Redfield/dp/153873026X
Anxiously Attached - Jessica Baum
https://www.amazon.ae/Anxiously-Attached-Becoming-More-Secure/dp/0593331060
Welcome to Good Intentions, the podcast where we explore the world around us to find meaning and intention in what we do. I'm Kelly Harvard , and I'm on a mission to spread positive stories that will inspire you to live a more meaningful and connected
Speaker 2:Life. In this episode, I revisit a previous guest. I last spoke to the wonderful Fiona Day back in 2020, just before Covid hit, and the world was turned completely upside down. And this time I have her on to talk about a menopause. And Fiona, hence very recently been struggling and navigating this challenging time of her life. And she came on to talk to me about it. She talked to me with such honesty and with such positivity about how she had managed to get her way through this. And it was such a welcome, refreshing conversation. Um , she's very warm . She has a very open personality , um, throwing the fact that she's also an intuitive consultant and an energy healer, and you really get a completely different dimension to a conversation, which is quite rightly gathering more speed and more attention. We talked about the menopause. We talked about how to navigate it as a woman. We talked about why it is something which just isn't talked about enough, and why it's so important that we start having these open conversations. We talked about how culture and society affects the way we talk about it, and she was super interesting when it comes to the loss of self that many women can feel when they go through this process and how we can navigate it and find ourselves. I really hope you enjoy this conversation. It's, it's so refreshing and I really hope that it helps a lot of people. Morning, Fiona, thanks so much for joining me today. Good morning.
Speaker 3:You're
Speaker 2:The first person I've ever spoken to you twice on the podcast. We last spoke almost three few years ago. Yeah, four years ago. Can you believe it? It was 2020. Oh , I remember that . Like
Speaker 3:Crazy. Yeah .
Speaker 2:We had such a fantastic conversation. And then when we reconnected about a very different topic this time. Um , although we may cover some old ground, I was so excited that you contacted me. So , um, thanks for finding the time to speak to me again.
Speaker 3:Thank you also for having me. I'm excited to be able to just, you know, for us to put this out there and help as many people as we can .
Speaker 2:Brilliant. So I'm gonna jump straight in. Fiona. So we're talking about menopause today. And tell me like, why is this an issue that you are so passionate about? Uh , why are you starting to talk to people about this? Like, tell us what's the reason for this. What's triggered it all for you?
Speaker 3:What triggered it for me was, obviously, you know, I know that when we , we get into our , our four , I know about the menopause, but I, with my experience, and that's why I'm jumping on, just to talk about my story and to be able to help other women because it's not easy. I just was gobsmacked at what we have to go through with our hormones. And I just, after I went to the doctors and, you know, I've got my, my HRT now, I was just driving, going, this is just not okay. We shouldn't be living like this. There was, there's not enough information out there. There should be more advertisements. The doctors should be talking about it more. The health organizations should be talking about it more. And I just felt so sad inside that women are sitting at home unaware the menopause. They , they , everybody's heard of the menopause, but you just don't put two and two together until, I mean, the lowest I went was I had the hot flushes. I haven't had my period for like a year and a half. So I kind of knew there was, you know, I'm heading in that direction. So I was having the hot flushes and I could deal with that. That's manageable. And as I'm talking to other women, they're also just managing hot flushes. But when it got to the sleep, Kelly , I just, I can't even tell you not being able to sleep. And it was so bad that we put it down to life, oh , maybe it's stress, maybe it's work. Maybe I'm not sleeping properly because I've got a lot on my mind, et cetera. But this was waking up at 2:00 AM 3:00 AM the worst it got for me. It , I was awake at 5:00 AM still, I was crying and I'm like, what is going on? And I , and I had like a two week spell of, I went quite down. So it wasn't just lack of sleep, it was depressed. I felt down, I lost my mojo. I was like, where have I gone? Where , where am I? Who , where , you know.
Speaker 2:So , so you're in this situation. You , you , you are aware that you don't feel great. Um , you're starting to feel worse and worse. So like, what was your first point of of call ? You went to a doctor, you went to a conventional gp. Um , what , what did you do?
Speaker 3:Right, so I have had a good few , couple of friends in England. They've been sending me links on Instagram, the , the menopause Thena McCall , which was a big thing in England. So I watched them because I was so busy in life and I just literally put it down to stress and, and I didn't really, the penny didn't drop until I was in Kaf war . I was in the supermarket and I hadn't slept. I was so down. And a friend from my past had moved back to Dubai, and she was just literally there in front of me. The universe saved me literally. And I said, I've not slept. And she's like, oh, are you on HRT ? And I went , no. She went, you need it, girl. You need it. And anyway, long story short, she had some leftover, which I don't recommend doing. I don't recommend doing this to anybody. Go to your menopause doctor, specifically the menopause doctor, not just a friend to get the medicine. But I was so Kelly, I was so desperate to sleep and just to not feel depressed. I took the progesterone, I put some gel on, oh my gosh, a game changer. I slept deeply. I didn't wake up in the night. The hot flashes left. So that was it, literally being in the supermarket. And she just stood there and said, let me help you. Wow.
Speaker 2:She was definitely sent to help you. She
Speaker 3:Was. And she just started the HRT herself. So she's been my rock. My friend in England's been my rock. She's also on HRT . So, and you know what, another thing I actually thought being spiritual and doing the work I do. And you know, I thought , oh , well , when I did think about menopause, I thought, oh, I'll just do it naturally.
Speaker 2:It's so funny you say this because I kind of have a similar outlook, <laugh>. I'm not saying I could meditate my way through . It don't , actually that's , but I thought no, no. Yeah, there's gonna be some sort of homeopathic. And I do actually have a good friend who's a homeopath, and she's like, yeah, I just kind of homeopath my way through it. Okay, I'm great if that works for you. But you know, that's not gonna work for everyone. But I think what you touch on here, Fiona, I think is really powerful. And I think it's quite a big point, is that the th well , the way that you first got help was from another woman. And I think it's this network of women are kind of sharing. And then obviously now it's becoming more mainstream. People are talking about it. But I think in the first instance, right, women talk to other women and we're very good at sharing. And I think sharing that knowledge, I mean, actually sharing practical, practical assistance in your case is so important. And , and again, like you were talking about your symptoms, so you weren't really sure, you know, okay, is is this normal? Is this stress? I mean, how , how can we tell the difference? I mean, or can't we tell the difference? Do you just literally need to go and get your bloods tested to know?
Speaker 3:Well, another thing about the bloods, as you've hit on it, the doctors that I've been, the mepa women that I've been , and I have some links and lists that I'll also throw out and you can add, it'll help people. They actually say, if you take your bloods one day it could be normal. And the next day it's off. So I go to Dr . Sarah in the Genesis clinic and she said, we're not gonna do your bloods. We are just gonna go off symptoms. So when I started, my partner actually sent me a brilliant po a podcast. This woman that I follow is , um, Mary Claire Haver in the us . And then it all started to click into place. And I'm going through the symptoms going, and actually when I sat with the doctor, she went, I feel that was the , the , the questionnaire of symptoms or whatever. And she went, oh, you have quite a lot of symptoms. I went, yes, there are between 60 and 80 symptoms. What of perimenopause? Meno , there's a lot. There's my goodness, there's a lot . What ,
Speaker 2:Six 80 ? I
Speaker 3:Know now . That's , that's
Speaker 2:Insane. That's wild.
Speaker 3:So what's thing is that this is my research, okay? So obviously I'm not a doctor. I'm talking about my experience, what I've been through, the information I've gathered, but to help other women that are scared of taking HRT because of the, the scare that that happened years ago. So for me, the hot sweats, I kind of knew, and then I was so busy in life, and then it was the no sleep. And then when I sat down and went through the symptoms, I was gobsmacked because we don't wanna be depressed. I didn't have anything to be down about. My life is good. I'm , I'm, I'm , I'm blessed. I've got my kids and, and work and you know, and I was like, why am I feeling like this? Awful.
Speaker 2:Yeah. But don't you think as well, Fiona, that that's one of the sort of really painful things about it, is that like, as women life and the con constructs and the difficulties that are thrown to us as women, you know, we're conditioned to keep going, aren't we? You know, we're the nurturer, we're the ones that take on the responsibility. Like we, we just basically keep on going. You know, we go to pregnancy, we go through childbirth, it's just exception as normal that this is what your body is gonna do and you're gonna go through it. So you just keep going and you, okay, I'm really busy and okay, I haven't slept six months. But that's normal, isn't it? And it's anyone , you have to sit down with someone you like. When I meet people that can sleep really easily, I mean , like , aside from wanting to strangle them , I'm always just like, wow, imagine if you just got into bed and your head hit the pillow and you went to sleep. Like , that's wild to me because I struggle so much with my sleep. So for me, I was like, well, I haven't slept in 30 years, so this just must be normal. And then someone actually looks at you and goes, no, no, that's , that's not normal <laugh>.
Speaker 3:And now that I'm on the progesterone and it's literally, oh my gosh, I go off to sleep easily. I go in a deep sleep. Yes , some nights I wake up, but very rarely now. So it was just a magic pill I'm taking and oh gosh, sleep . The sleep. And, you know, a lot of, can I just briefly go through the list of sim terms just to throw it out there ?
Speaker 2:Well , this is what I wanted to ask you, Fiona, because like , I think that the symptom is that people know, or the hot flushes, everyone talks about hot flushes, right? And I think sleeplessness, yes. But I mean, what are these other things that you might, I mean you actually the full 60 or 80, but tell us a couple of others that we might not be aware of. Yeah,
Speaker 3:So the perimenopause, you know , women start the perimenopause mid thirties. I didn't even know that Kelly . I was unaware that I could have been 34, 35. And in perimenopause. So, you know, the perimenopause symptoms, again, same as menopause, mood changes, anxiety, depression, headaches, sexual drive, which is a big thing in the menopause. Um, trouble concentrating joint and muscle pains, irregular periods, frozen shoulder people, women are complaining of teeth issues. And the one that makes me so sad is the women with suicidal thoughts. And there's a lot of women out there with suicidal thoughts because you have no, I mean the hormones are just, they're haywire, you know, feeling tired all the time. Irritability, anger, discomfort during intercourse, feeling loss of self. That's a big one as well. 'cause we don't, we just lose ourself . We dunno what we've gone. Um, weight gain, that's a big one for women. They're struggling with that panic attacks. So there's the perimenopause, which is before the periods end. And then when our periods stop, we go into the full on menopause. But when I had the hot flushes, then it was very quickly where I couldn't sleep. I mean, I , I was struggling with sleep . I just, like you put it down to stress, no was my hormones. And if only I'd known 10 years ago, even if I knew about perimenopause, if I'd known five years ago, I could have prepared myself, educated myself. There's obviously a toolkit here. This isn't just about taking hormone replacement treatment. There is a toolkit like , uh, Marie Claire aver talks about, which is the, the nutrition. Very important. The nutrition, the, the fitness. It's big, big, big. And I've just gone to the gym myself and noticed how much more mentally that's helping me. So there's , there's three out there that they say that's , I've added a cup myself . So fitness, nutrition, and you need the hormone replacement treatment, but also you need to do stuff off , be kind to yourself as you're going through this and you are in a healing, which we will obviously that's, we can , we can talk about that later. But there's so many, you know, UTIs are a big one. Women are struggling and, and suffering with UTIs . That's also, you know, if we've got low progesterone and low estrogen in the body, I think it's the estrogen. Then we, we are gonna struggle with all of this. So we need to keep it balanced. We're just topping up estrogen and progesterone.
Speaker 2:So there fusions for symptoms. You know, every woman at some point is going to be going through this at any time , at any point in time. There must be millions of women going through this. Like why are doctors not more knowledgeable about this? And why am I do feel it's coming to the public psyche a lot more recently. You mentioned , um, Davina , and there's, you know, there's quite a lot of people now speaking out about it more, but why , why have doctors been so reluctant to kind of get a grip on this and why isn't it part of the zeitgeist more?
Speaker 3:Yeah, I mean, I've been listening to a lot of podcasts and YouTubes myself to educate myself and the doctors, what they generally tend to do, they don't have enough edu information and education on the menopause. So women are going, and I've heard a lot of women say that they're just getting handed out antidepressants.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I believe this is the , this is the first port of call in the UK as well , right? That doctors are actually instructed to just basically hand out . I mean, they're cheap, right? They're , they're cheap and they're easy and you don't have to really delve into expensive blood tests or potentially expensive. HRTI think is the reason why, which
Speaker 3:Isn't good, you know? So that's what I , all my clients that I've been seeing lately, I've been, I've blessed them. I'm like, right, please go to check your go go on to , and I give them some websites or whatever and just say, if it resonates with you, then go see the doctor. But they'll doctor the specialized doctor in HRT . The general practitioners generally literally will say, you know, because they're all of symptoms. If someone's got a frozen shoulder and it is actually related to the , the menopause, they're going to the doctors and the doctors are putting them through unnecessary checks.
Speaker 2:Yeah. Sending you off to the physio maybe . Yeah. So I mean, when it comes on to HRT, do you feel that there's any reluctance from people? I mean, not necessarily just doctors, but also just willing, I mean , I know there was this scare story a few years ago, which seems to have sort of swayed people and, and obviously I think if you find breast cancer, you do need to be really careful about, you know, HRT and it might not even be an option for you. But is this negativity about the HRT sort of almost shooting ourselves in the foot? 'cause we're not prepared to necessarily embrace it as fast as we could.
Speaker 3:And that also makes me sad, knowing that women are sat at home in fear by just going to the menopause doctor. And I take the bioidentical, the , and it's, it's natural. It comes from the ya plant . So I do have links here so people can go on and research for themselves. It's not a synthetic one, it's a natural one going in just to <inaudible> up with the lack of estrogen, progesterone. So there's a not enough awareness, there's not enough support. And women have been said , you know, I've got a friend the other night, we went out last week, she's having hot flushes. And I'm like, my love, you're the same age as me now just please go to the go. She's not sleeping. I said, look, and her periods have stopped. I said, you are in the menopause, just to let you know. She went. But my mom died from cancer and the doctor sold her, the mother, her mother, this is from the HRT. So my friend is now scared to go and take it. And when I explained to her it's from the yam plant , she went, really? I went, yeah. Oh, I didn't know that. I said, I'll send you some links, just read about it. Because I mean, bless her, she, she reminded me of me a few months back.
Speaker 2:Yeah, but that's, it's fear is real, isn't it? And if someone's told you something like that, it's difficult to let go of it. So, I mean, you mentioned these sort of things that you, you can do to try and help yourself, which, why wouldn't we at least try and embrace those to try and alleviate the symptoms? What are the main ones that you would focus on? You mentioned exercise, you mentioned diet as well , uh, ex Yeah. What else can we be doing to try and at least navigate this more easily?
Speaker 3:I'm learning also from, I mean, the lady that I follow in the us , Mary Claire, she talks a lot about nutrition. So I've now, I'm on some supplements. So if I take my vitamin D, my B six, B12, I've got my multivitamins there. I think you can't, if you take vitamin D, the magnesium, if I'm correct, won't work properly without the vitamin D. Magnesium's really good for the body. It's different for me because I'm a , I'm vegan, so I need to just top up with extra, you know. But nutrition, the supplements definitely are really good support. I also take five HTP, which is the natural kind of, it's a , it's a mood booster because we do struggle with the low moods in, in our menopause in the journey. And that helps. So I feel like I'm getting, you know, we don't wanna live in a rollercoaster of emotions, Kelly . We wanna feel balanced, we wanna feel normal. Like I said, I've started at the gym, so I, that's made me feel much better mentally. That's really good mentally. So even if people are afraid of gyms or go join in class, walk, swim, there's other areas out there that you could go to just to, you know, and it's gonna affect us in the long run. This isn't just about now helping us. This, you know, lack of estrogen, progesterone, also testosterone. We haven't touched on that. I'm going back to the doctor this month to just try it out. Cannot wait. We need all of that. But later, you know, it's a problem. They say with osteoporosis, dementia, Alzheimer's, if we are lacking in the estrogen and progesterone, and I'm excited to go and get the testosterone and everybody will think testosterone is, is related to, you know, the sex drive. It , it is. But that's not main reason I wanna go because I know that I , I also, I dunno about you, but I get , um, a bit of forgetfulness, a bit of heaviness, a bit of brain fog, and that's annoying.
Speaker 2:Is it supposed to help with those things as well? Yes.
Speaker 3:So I feel the intuitively I wanna go try out the testosterone because it's good for, it reduces fatigue as well. The tiredness , um, improves our mood and it helps with the bone , uh, muscle mass. So there's great benefits as well for the testosterone. So the combination there is, is really important.
Speaker 2:I also, you mentioned five HTP, I also hear really good things about Ashwaganda. I've been taking that recently. Um, it's been scientifically proven. It , it decreases your cortisol, you know , that's stressful alone . So yeah. And , uh, it's, it's supposed to be really good. So I've been trying that as well. I'm not a doctor guys, but <laugh> , you have to kind of do it . But a few things on trial and error of what's worked for me and what's worked for you. So , um, yeah , I think it's important.
Speaker 3:Exactly. And something else that I don't know about you personally, but when I did start the, I was on the gel, the estrogen gel, and you , it's, it's a trial and error to see like I'm on a pump and there's women in England that I'm talking to my friends that are on seven to eight pumps now. Everybody's individual, everybody's different. I then upped it a bit because I came back from my trip and I felt a bit flat. So then I shouldn't have done this. I upped it a little bit. So I went up another pump and I think I got a bit overloaded <laugh> . So then my, I was so tired, I felt down. So then I went back to my one. So it's about not , don't personally maybe play around with it, but, but speak to the doctors. But everybody's different. Everybody's body is unique. So, but the one pump for me right now, I feel calm, I feel balanced. And another thing, Kelly , when you are in the menopause, the emotions like the trigger you could be feeling. Okay. And then you just get this rush of energy, of emotion come up. It's awful. Mm-Hmm , <affirmative> .
Speaker 2:And like you say , no one wants to be living on a rollercoaster. We all just wanna aqui , quiet, calm, peaceful, steady life, right? So, nice life . Yeah , of course, of course. I mean, you mentioned something earlier fi which I really wanted to touch on. You said like you felt like this loss of self and it feels like as this, as you're gonna go through this part of your journey in life, you're potentially going to sort of really struggle with that. And you know that I'm interested in how sort of spirituality and, and growth and then you've faced this, you know, I dunno who I am anymore. I mean, how are we supposed to navigate that, you know? Okay, you've , you've got all this physical things and , and you're trying to get through that, and then you've got this huge, almost like a crisis of identity as well. I mean, how on earth do we reconcile with that ? I mean, has the HRT helped you and kind of snapped you into feeling better about that? Or are you still navigating that? And if so, how?
Speaker 3:I still am navigating it a little bit. I mean, I'm a busy woman, you know, like you, I'm a mom, I'm working, so I'm getting better. But I said to my friend, and actually I , I gave a session to one of my clients who I know, and she's on HRT and we were discussing this and she went, let me know when you get your mojo back and let me know where you find it. 'cause I've lost mine. We just lose our mojo a bit. That, that fire, that excitedness, that passion, you know? So it's a lot better than what it was three months ago because I am like, literally we are, who am I? What's happened, what's happening to me? It's, it's, it's okay . So it is coming back, yes, to answer your question, but I will say the exercise is really helping me as well.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I, I agree with you on that. I mean, I've always exercised from sort of being about 15, but I was always, you know, I went through different stages of why I was doing it, right? So in my early twenties and even in my thirties, I just wanted to look good in a bikini <laugh>, especially living in Dubai. Right. You know , and you're at the beach every weekend. Yeah. But in recent years, I've completely forgotten about that. And I could let it slip because I'm quite slim. So I was like, it doesn't really matter if I do exercise. Whereas now I'm like, no , I don't, I don't even care anymore about how I look. It's mainly I do it for my mental health. And I've even gone sometimes and I've been quite tearful as I've walked in or quite tearful even during halfway through a workout, I found myself getting tearful the other day thinking about the state of the world. But you have to do it right because it makes you feel so much better. It's, it's the best antidepressant you can find,
Speaker 3:Especially when you're on this journey, you know? And like I touched on , there's women that are still got their periods that are in the perimenopause. So if you can get the help, do the nutrition, because obviously what we are, what what we eat, what we're putting in is gonna have an effect on our body and how we feel and our , and the level of energy and vibration and all of that. So it is important. But for me personally, when I've take , now I'm on the HRT , I can just feel myself getting mentally stronger , um, you know, more excited. So it does take time and the doctor does say, 'cause I'm impatient and I'm like, how long is this gonna take. She's like, well it could take a few, two to three months while my goodness, the sleep <inaudible> just stay left . Right ? But it does take a while just for your body to adjust, for you to understand which, you know , how much you need, et cetera . You
Speaker 2:Have a bit of patience. Right. Which is not what we always have when , especially when it comes to your mental health. I mean, you've mentioned sort of earlier, you know, one of your friends saying , I thought I was just gonna kind of just, just float through it. I mean, is this the biggest sort of myth that you hear from people? I mean, what other misconceptions are there? You know, I'm , I'm just gonna be fine or No, I can't take HRT because of this, or it's not gonna be that bad. You know, one thing, what I heard recently was, oh, you know, well my mom , my mom said it was fine, so I'm sure it's gonna be fine for me. And I was like, but was your mom fine? Or is your mom just at that generation where you just put up and shut up with it? Do you know what I mean? Like what , what are people kind of believing about it that is just not true?
Speaker 3:Well, I mean, the women that I'm, you know, with my work and , and the women that I'm meeting through my sessions most as I ask a question, most of their , their mothers, they're not on HRT and I , I've had a lot of women say, well, I don't really have <inaudible> , that's great, but we still need and progesterone in our body so it , it doesn't, it's what in life as well. So there's a lot of women that don't have loads of symptoms and there's women that do have symptoms. I had a lady three weeks ago sat here. She was so down , she's like, I just, I sought what to do. So I gave her the information and she went away and hopefully she's, she's gone off to the doctors . So there's a lot of women that have symptoms that don't have symptoms that think that they don't need the HRT 'cause they don't have it all symptoms and they're managing it. But like I said, osteoporosis, Alzheimer's, mental health, it could be a problem later on in your fifties, in your sixties, even in your seventies. I'm reading as well about women now on these podcasts that women in their seventies are going and getting HRT 'cause they didn't understand, they didn't realize women in their eighties are going to take it. So it's never, you're never too old.
Speaker 2:And once you start taking it, Fiona, do you have to take it forever? Is that it ? Is it , uh, okay, okay. Which I guess to some people might feel a bit offputting.
Speaker 3:Yes. I mean, for perimenopause, my friend is at , she, she's 15 now, I think nearly , she's in perimenopause, she still has her periods, but she's on HRT , so she's 15 days on, 15 days off. I don't have periods. I, so I'm on it constantly. So I'm on the progesterone at night and the estrogen constantly. There's another thing that I would like to get include later , which is there's a website here called UAE peptides.com. My partner's educated me a bit about that.
Speaker 2:Okay. So I interviewed Dean. So I , Dean was a podcast guest. I had him on a couple of months ago. Oh yeah , Dean . Yeah. He's amazing. Yeah, he's amazing. Peptides are like unbelievable. It's like this is a secret that we're just , people are not talking about enough. Yeah. He's fantastic. And he , um, was telling me about the special sort of special ones tailored to women. I mean, he's got all sorts of these peptides, right? It's like a best kept secret that I feel the world needs to know about.
Speaker 3:So did is brilliant. You interviewed him, which is, so later when I can, I will absolutely take the peptides. Um, I think there's one for Kiss Peptide, but that's the one my partner wants to put me on a bit later. So that is something I'll do future, but I'm excited about them as well. Uh, so yeah, people can go to the website, uae peptide.com, weeds , take my, my notes , my and a few weeks and I had my notes on the table and I'd written just some stuff down and he'd written Turns Dragons into butterflies, <laugh> , that's , he wrote on my piece of paper. And I'm like, really? Oh , and he's like, and listen , he is never, he's never put any, if I've been crying or a bit a bit down, he is never said over amenable . He's supportive. So I'm lucky.
Speaker 2:And this is what I wanted to ask you about. I feel like we face so much prejudice, right? As a woman and discrimination, whether that's in your private life, you know, at work, I'm sure everyone's got a horror story about being discriminated against at work. If we start talking about the menopause and if we start telling everyone about it and trying to raise awareness, and this is what's gonna happen. I mean, isn't this just another stick to beat us with, you know, we're already getting, you know, you can get, I know it's the laws against it in some countries and other countries, but you know, you, you get pregnant, you have a baby, you go back to work. It's not law for anyone to fire you, but you can get managed out. I mean, isn't there a danger, this is gonna happen to like another, an older generation of women who people are just gonna think, whether it's employers, they're gonna think, no, I don't wanna take anyone along that's like 45 because you know , in five years they're gonna start collapsing at work and I'm not gonna be able to get the best outta them. Like, is this, are we creating another problem for ourselves by talking about this?
Speaker 3:No, we're not. Because more women need to look after themselves, you know, for their mental health. Get onto it if it resonates with you. But I mean, can you imagine the rise of the feminine and how of a positive impact it will have in the workplace of balanced hormones and amazing, amazing.
Speaker 2:I completely agree with you, but I just feel there's, there could be many people out there that will, that will use it against us. And that's what worries me. And I'm not saying of course, let's not talk about it because that's , you know, we're here talking about it now. I just get nervous when people start talking about our flaws, whether they're, you know, it's just, and I remember my old md, she was amazing. She had gone through the menopause and she was asking me about it, and I was telling her how old I was, and she was like, oh yeah. And it , she was like, this trait is coming for you. But she always said to me, it's just biology, Kelly. It's just biology. And that's how she used to talk about it. It's just biology, no big deal. So she was always very pragmatic about it. But then she did get managed out of her role.
Speaker 3:Did she? Yeah,
Speaker 2:She did. So, you know , uh, it's difficult, right? Yeah, it
Speaker 3:Is. But then, you know, I also, this isn't just about a feminine , this is about the masculine, because I've been educated and my, my partner's been telling me about most men in their mid thirties , their testosterone drops. So men need to put the testosterone in as well, you know, so without their testosterone, they will be moody down, similar, similar symptoms to what we go through, you know, weight gain. So we're all in it together. So you could have a guy in his forties, fifties that has no clue that he's got no testosterone in him, and he is angry and he is stressed and he's sad. And you've got a woman in the next office, let's say, that's lacking in, in her hormonal treatment that she needs. So it's the same for everybody. In fact, somebody was just interviewed on the , one of the radio channels here, and he'd gone on to say that his brother had killed himself off because he didn't realize he had no testosterone. And the brother that was talking on the radio station also said I was about to kill myself to , I was suicidal and so depressed. Went to the doctor, reached out, realized his , he , his levels, his levels were non-existent of testosterone. So we're all on it . Like you say , it's biology, we're all going through it. So we need to support one another.
Speaker 2:Yeah, exactly. That's a really interesting point actually. I went to think that there would be two people sat next to one another, both sexes, both going through it. Yeah, no, you're right. You are right.
Speaker 3:Just going through it and , and , and it's the same for men. Nutrition, exercise, testosterone. My guy said he takes estrogen blockers or something he takes. So it's the same for all of us , the girls and the boys.
Speaker 2:Yeah, no , definitely. And I mean, I know, you know, as a, you , you are so much into your intuition, Fiona, and you're so well connected with sort of, you know, different realms and with this sort of spirituality that guides you, I mean, what , what can we do from a sort of mindfulness and spiritual perspective to help us kind of navigate this?
Speaker 3:I mean, look, when you're in it and when the emotions come up, the triggers come up and it feels like it's overwhelming. You dunno how to, to manage it, the triggers goodness. So it's about just calming yourself, number one. Look, I'm a bit different in the sense of I am an intuitive coach. That's what I do. I feel energy, people come to me, I can look ahead in, in their life and see what's coming. So for me, not knowing, is it stress, is it energy? Is it something I'm feeling like it was confusing because I can literally standing a lift and feel what that person's going through next to me . That's how open I am . So I got a bit confused of, well what is it? So it walks , I mean there's lots we can do to help ourselves and it could be get , so what , what people need to do is obviously we can't put all the blame on, on let's say menopause, meno, menopause. But once you are , you are balanced, you're on your medication, you're on your HRT , if there's still stuff coming at you, then obviously it could be in a child stuff, it could be stressed . So that needs to be managed as well.
Speaker 2:Yeah, definitely. I mean you've given like so many really helpful resources as well about where people can go. And I mean, you mentioned quite a lot bit was from the UK podcasts. I mean, is there anything specific that Yeah, so you Yeah, Marie Claire . Marie Claire Aver , was that her name?
Speaker 3:Yes. There's a lady also called Dr. Potter . She's a Meno menopause doctor in the uk. Um, I think that's Savina's doctor, if I'm not mistaken. I could be wrong.
Speaker 2:Oh , okay . Okay .
Speaker 3:There's a revolve health.com. So that's another good website to go on. Obviously the Dina mcc , the Dina McCall website's brilliant because , uh, she's got YouTubes out there. There's also something I listened to the other day, which was really interesting. It's Davina McCall on the myths of 2000 and twos. Controversial HRT study.
Speaker 2:Oh , okay. Which is what we talked touched on earlier, right. With people being nervous about taking it because there was this link
Speaker 3:That's really, really for them to listen to. I heard something today and I I had to write it down, 14% of women that are in the menopause age, only 14% are on HRT in the uk. Only 4% are on HRT in America. And before it was 40% before the scare in 2002 there was 40% and it dropped down to 4% because of the scare. Can I just throw out a couple of names as well for the, I mean, you've mentioned a lady, your doctor, which is great. I see Dr. <inaudible> , I think her name is in Genesis Clinic, that's in science park. I was also, I dunno why I thought this, but I thought going to the menopause doctor was gonna be thousands. It wasn't, it's 700 Durhams with this lady for the consultation and then the 300 Durhams for three months medication.
Speaker 2:It's achievable, isn't it? Yeah, I think all the, if you wanna have start having things like the hormone tests , they're often not covered. Right. Because , um, so this is what I was told anyway , so when I went to have my bloods checked and a really nice nurse called me to interrogate me, she said from the insurance company, she said, we're not, we're not prepared to , um, to sign this off . And she started asking me loads of questions about contraception and pregnancy and I said, why are you asking me all these questions? And she said, because if you are trying to get your hormones checked, it's normally because you're trying to have a baby and we don't cover IVF , so we wanna make really sure that you're not pretending to do this for one reason so that you can actually go and secretly have a baby. Yeah. So I was like, look, I can handle my heart tell you there are no more babies coming from me. Know where that factory is closed quite some time ago , <laugh> . Um , but yeah, I thought that was really interesting. I mean obviously this is unique to Dubai with our very, you know, privileged private healthcare insurance. I mean, I, I've had friends in Dubai that, and friends in the UK that get no joy whatsoever from their UK gps and they have to pay to go private in order to get any sort of semblance of help. So I think we're in a , we're in a lucky situation that at least we can just go straight to somebody who can help us. And they're , we
Speaker 3:Can
Speaker 2:Pre-selected
Speaker 3:Yes, the menopause doctor in the clinics that's not covered on health insurance also. Right. That's separate you And it should be free mammograms should be free. I mean, it should all be free. And you know what makes me sad? I think about like, I'm very well connected to Catman do Nepal as, as you know, from previous discussion. I think about they don't have the support like we do in England with the NHS over there. And then I think about how many women are in their menopause. They've got no support and they've got no money to go get this, this medicine. There's so many women globally, not just in Nepal, but I obviously it pops into my mind quite a lot struggling because they're not having that support. And marriages are breaking up, relationships are breaking up because of the change in , in us. It's a big thing.
Speaker 2:We'll see , there's no , we're side here, you know, very lucky that we've got access to all this healthcare . You're right. I mean, ever since, you know , the genocide and Palestine started, I can't stop thinking about, you know, women pregnant, giving birth, having to cope with their periods every month. I mean, imagine it's bad enough having to do it in a, you know , in a place where you've got access to running water in a, you know , first class healthcare. Imagine having to go through it then it's a really, it's a very sobering point. And like , do you feel hopeful about this, Fiona, do you feel that the message is now getting out, that people are starting ? I mean, do you , would you, if , is that a message to someone that you would say to someone sort of that that's struggling like this is, this is gonna get better. You can manage this. Do you feel hopeful about women going into this?
Speaker 3:I'm so excited about, like you said earlier, you are sharing the information with your friends. I'm sharing it with the ladies. I'm telling everybody, please just go get it. Go get yourself checked. I am so hopeful and so excited about women realizing what's going on, not fearing, releasing fear, going to the, to the menopause doctor and helping themselves. You know, because I'm really super excited and you know, me being me, I've been on my journey of life and I've had to go through a C or whatever. So then I've got the awareness and I can then help and educate my client . So I've had to go through a lot in life. So I experience it so then I can go on and help more people. Yeah,
Speaker 2:No that's, it's definitely something that I think women are , are very good at is this sort of sharing and sharing on a deep level as well. Right. You know, I went to a kid's party yesterday and within two minutes I'm having very deep conversations with women that I've never met before about health, wellness, marriages, divorce kids , you know, that's what we're good at, right? We can connect when we're at our best. We can connect and go deep really quickly, which I think is just brilliant. Um, to try and share and support one another, which is what it's all about.
Speaker 3:Can I also just mention a little bit about relationships here? Because there's a lot of relationships breaking up. Partners, boyfriend, girlfriend, whether they're married because there's lack of information education, the woman doesn't know what she's going through. The man is just like, well my wife's or whatever's just not the same. And it's important like fix your hormones, sort them out, get them balanced and then you can have a look at the relationship. So once you are balanced, you can sit back and go, actually is it the relationship or was it my hormones? So that's important as well.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I think you're right. And I think this is almost like with anything in life, right? It's like <laugh> when you're depressed and people say, well you just need to exercise. And you're like, well, if I wasn't depressed I would like , I can't exercise because I'm too depressed and it's too debilitating. So you need to kind of not fix because we're not broken, but you need to start solving that problem, which will then enable you to do everything else. So kind of work on that and then you can move to a place where, yeah, you are happy to go and you know, go for a walk on the beach or go to F 45 or whatever you're gonna do, but you need some help when you're in that deep dark hole. Otherwise nothing seems surmountable, nothing seems doable, nothing seems fixable.
Speaker 3:And when you're in that space , Kelly , I dunno about you, but it's not a nice place to be. I have a little story, actually hadn't read for a lady last year. She , in her fifties, she came to me, she was down and she was sad apparently, I can't remember at the time, but I spoke about menopause and HRT , she went away, she came back to me a few weeks back, I opened the door like , wow, your energy shank , what's happened? She sat down, she went HRT . Oh my goodness. I was so happy to hear those words because her, all , her whole energy had shifted into positivity. She's got her, she just looked , she was glowing from somebody that was crying down, lost. She was struggling. You know, like we, we ha we , we are, it was so nice to see that refreshing because many women that I'm reading for and not taking HRT like I said earlier, there's three women including you that I've met over the past three months that are on HRT . It's
Speaker 2:Crazy, isn't it?
Speaker 3:And struggling like , we don't need to struggle. Yeah,
Speaker 2:No, definitely not. I mean, and and when you mentioned women are coming to you, why are people, when they come to you, what are they coming for? Are they coming for an answer to something? Are they just coming to try and feel hope? Are they, is there something that drives them to you and then as part of that you start to uncover all these other things which might need sort of addressing? Yeah,
Speaker 3:I mean a lot of them come to talk about their work. They're mainly a relationships. 'cause we wanna know about our love life and what's coming. And I love to, yes, I can see what's coming, but I also like to be able to go a bit deeper with people and say, right, if you've got any triggers there or any childhood wounds you need, you know, I give them a little bit of a toolkit to go away. So this love life career, I like to coach them through the session as well. I love coaching. I do that also within my work, but mainly love, life , career. And what I can do with how I work is I can go in and really feel a lot even with their families, you know, if they've got situations. And so it , it's mainly love life I guess. And career .
Speaker 2:Amazing. It's interesting what people are driven by and then what else you might uncover when you're with them. Right. I find that really fascinating. The last time I spoke to you, which was four years ago, I mean, obviously we , I come between in between, but the last time we talked on this podcast, it was over four years ago. And I asked you at the time if there were any books that you would recommend to people. And I still, I mean I like to ask this question for everybody and I'd love to ask it of you again. I mean, maybe you've got a menopause book you wanna throw in this time. But are there any, are there any books that may have changed since then? Are they , are , are there any books that you're still recommending to people that come to see that you're still take say , is there anything new that you found that you wanna say to people that you've just gotta read this book? It's incredible.
Speaker 3:Yeah. Great. I'm glad you asked that question. 'cause I always give out books, recommendations to every client and the ones that have really impacted me throughout my life, and I always talk about is many lives, many masters, Dr. Brian Wise, I love all these books. I, there's two that I love, many lives, many masters. And then his second book is Only Love is Real, love it for relationships. A book I've just read and I love is The Five Love Languages.
Speaker 2:Yeah, that's a great one, isn't it? Yeah. You know, there's one for children as well, which I found. Absolutely . I read it . No , you know, obviously when you have kids Yeah, there's one for kids , specifically for kids. So that , I mean, you , I mean if you read the , if you read the first one, you can probably work it out. But it's just really interesting to have it framed around children and and identifying. Yeah, really lovely. I'd have to say, you know , this many lives , many master books. So you recommended this to me last time and I then recommended it to other people, but I couldn't find it. And you know, I have a little library outside my house. It turned up there I swear like about six months after. Well I , because when we spoke I didn't have the light . No, I did have the library. Just couldn't find this book anywhere. I was, you know, every time I went to the UK I would be trying to , people looking at me blankly and then it turned up in my library. So I was like, well that's been sent by Fiona, by the universe has has sent this to me . So yeah, some amazing books turn up in my library. It wouldn't surprise me if a couple of these others that you mentioned turn up soon as well because some talents, journey
Speaker 3:Of Souls is another good one. Dr. Newton , I like also Joe Vitale's Zero Limits with the, the Mantra The Ho , which I do daily. It's brilliant. The book's fantastic. I remember reading the Celestine Prophecy and what I was like, wow. And there's a movie on YouTube of the Celestine. So I think the Celestine in many lives, the ones that just really opened my eyes and changed my life, obviously the power of manifestation in the sense of what we think we attract, literally what we feel we attract. So The Secret is another one out there that's, you know, most people know about. So I love a good book. I've read , uh, dances with horses , uh, Klaus Ferdinand Hesling, and he talks about the connection and energy with the horse and the animals and how we communicate with one another. It's fascinating. So I love books. I love a Good Reads.
Speaker 2:Yeah, no , me too, me too. And yeah , the dancers of horses . So I actually interviewed Kelly Eid, who is , um, she's a horse whisperer basically. And um, gosh, what an interesting person she is. If you haven't met her. Fiona, I'll , I'll share her details with you after we've spoken because you would absolutely love her. Very powerful energy coming from horses for all sorts of different reasons and the way that they're very good at reading and they, they mirror as well. So when , I mean, as you'll know, you've read the book.
Speaker 3:I rescued my Horse Maverick three years ago. Of
Speaker 2:Course you did. Yeah, of course you did. How is he? He's
Speaker 3:So good. I love him so much. I have , um, a lady in South Africa, Kate Muller , she's an animal whisperer. So I had some sessions with her and I, she started telling me and communicating with Maverick and I was like blown away crying because I was like, wow. So I love all of that. He's obviously , he's a masculine, so I'm learning from him. You know, we have this amazing connection and it's fascinating. I love it. The whole animal kingdom and animals and horses are amazing.
Speaker 2:They , they are all animals. I mean, my husband die rolls sometimes when I'm, you know, whispering sweet. Nothings into the cat's ear. And he's like, you know how , why are you talking? I'm like, he is talking to me all the time. He's communicating to me all the time. It's just that you can't hear it. Just 'cause he can't speak doesn't mean he's not speaking to me . But yeah, I mean I'm, I'm the crazy cat lady. So , um, I have to ask you, I always like to ask a couple of big questions at the end Fiona, and I'd love to know like, what do you think we're here for? Why are we here? What's our purpose on earth?
Speaker 3:What
Speaker 2:I
Speaker 3:Believe and what resonates with me is, you know , we're all here, we're all on our private personal journey. We come in alone, we go out alone, we connect with other souls, we get these strong connections, we get these traumatic connections, however it may be. And I believe we're just here for evolution. You know, we're here to work on ourselves for karma to become a better version of ourselves. Yeah. And we're all trying to navigate and we all need to help one another Kelly, you know, and just to change the vibe of the planet, it needs to be lifted up. It's not in a great place as you can see. So supporting one another and working through our issues. 'cause we don't wanna sit down, depressed, stressed, fearful. We wanna work through it. We wanna be happy, we wanna live our best lives. So we are evolving as souls, as consciousness. I completely agree . It's not easy.
Speaker 2:It's not, it's not at all. There's um , there's an easy way and there's a hard way. And it's definitely a hard way to try and do that. I think sometimes as I'm on that journey as well. And just finally, Fiona, I mean if you have to look back on everything, you've achieved so much and you've had such an interesting journey that we covered in sort of part one of our conversation to kind of get to this point. And I really recommend that people go back and listen to that conversation as well 'cause it was so powerful. What do you think you would say is your sort of biggest achievement as you've gone through that journey?
Speaker 3:Well, obviously my , my children. 'cause I adore them. I love them. I , I'm very proud of my kids and my single mom. So we're very close. I would say telly , again, my evolution, you know, when I think back to my childhood and what I've been through and where I've come from and who I am now, I'm proud that I've worked through it and I can help people and, and help myself. So that's my biggest achievement is my evolution. 'cause we all have insecurities, fears, anger, rejection, abandonment issues, whatever it may be. We all have got the baggage. So it's just about working on it and clearing it and becoming the , the best version of ourselves. We don't wanna be , be living in anger and jealousy and fear and hate and all of that. No. So my evolution, I'm proud of, you
Speaker 2:Know, someone said to me something the other day, they said, you are bleeding on someone that didn't cut you. And I thought that was such an interesting way of putting it. And I think, you know, you're absolutely right. It's, yeah , you've gotta do this work so that you can live a life that's of fulfillment and don't, don't push those things onto other people. What a great point to end on. I really, I really loved that answer, Fiona. Thank you. And hopefully this conversation will go one small , small, small contribution to helping people get on that path. Yeah. Let's hope. Brilliant. Thank you so much for your time, Fiona. It was amazing to chat to you. Thank you for having me.
Speaker 1:Thanks so much for listening to the Good Intentions podcast. You can find links to issues and to books that we discussed in the show notes. And you can look for the podcast on Instagram. It's good intentions, UAE. Please do make sure you subscribe to the podcast, and if you enjoyed this conversation, I'd so appreciate a review on whatever platform you're using. It helps more people find out about the podcast. See you next time.